Daughterhood and Motherhood

I am a daughter. My own mother is not a person I want to be around for very terrible personal reasons that no one wants to hear about. Suffice it to say I did not learn how to be a mommy from her. I do have a non biological Mom. We have not always gotten along but I did learn more about being true to one's self from her than from my own parents. I think she may have even given me the ability to be a very independent person in a way. I did get a lot from her and I am not even sure she realizes it. I have held her at a very long distance for a good many years but in a serious time of crisis many years ago she did step up and help. For that I am grateful to her. Then another person who I am not close too but wish I could have been is my late father's widow. She actually was a good step-mom to my youngest brother and I know she is special to him. When she came into the picture though I was a confused teenager and I don't think I was nice to her. Of course as a teen you don't have a real picture of the world yet though you believe that you do. I was full of opinions and beliefs that I no longer hold as life has taught me differently. And then there is my Grandmother. She was the dominant mother in my life and many of the traits I still display are due to her. I would love to believe I have the best of all three of these women and none of the less desirable traits. Maybe my flaws come from my biological mother. I know I can't be perfect but I think my best stuff is from the moms who really cared about me.
I have birthed six children and no two of them are even a bit alike. They survived my mothering somehow and are all healthy and for the most part thriving adults. Two of them have even given me lovely grandchildren. As a Mom I knew more about what not to do than about what to do. Some of the ways I chose to raise my babies came straight from my heart. I was a hands on baby cuddler. It was the best part of mothering and I enjoyed it the most. They all grew out of it though and became little people and as they grew they at varying degrees began to slip from my hugs and reach out to the world without me. I let them. Sometimes I chose to let them and other times it was out of my control completely. Either way they all found a sense of themselves and found who they were. They are all beautiful people and the ones with kids are developing new beautiful people. What more can a Mom expect from them right?